Failure is a Prerequisite for Success

Did you know that Starbucks submitted 244 loan applications before they could open their very first location? Two hundred forty-four! Just think about that level of persistence. Now, look at them — Starbucks is all over the world, brewing up community and caffeine wherever you go.

How many times do we look at someone else’s success and forget the mountain of effort it took to get there? Too often, we fail to see what it really takes to build a dream worthy of our lives.

There’s a story I love about a miner who gave up just three feet from hitting a gold vein. He had invested everything, and when he lost hope, he sold the claim to a man who owned a scrap metal business. Here’s the twist: the new owner brought in a geologist, who quickly discovered the gold vein was just three feet away from where the first miner had stopped digging. The scrap metal owner struck it rich, while the original dreamer was left struggling.

How often are we just three feet from our own gold, but talk ourselves out of going any further?

One reason we give up is because we buy into a false perception of success. We see someone at the top of their game and imagine they just magically landed there overnight. But dig a little deeper, and you’ll always find a journey full of odd jobs, late nights, missed shots, and moments of doubt. Every “overnight success” is years in the making.

Every failure is a growth opportunity, a moment to get curious instead of discouraged. Ask yourself: What did I learn from this? What would I do differently next time? Each experience holds a seed of wisdom and power, if you’re willing to look for it.

Many years ago, I started a business as a street vendor. I bought a step van and transformed it into my “Crepe Wagon”, serving sweet crepes with fresh local berries, a spicy chili crepe, and breakfast options. My very first event was a small artisan craft fair just nine blocks from my house. It took me eleven tries (and just as many broken cables) to get that wagon parked and running. Beyond the electrical mayhem, the business was both a massive joy and a huge challenge. For three years, the Crepe Wagon was invited to major events because people loved the food, and I got the chance to build a little community around every stop.

The vision was so powerful, I kept going, challenges and all. What I learned in those years still serves me to this day:

• When faced with the unexpected, I could work my way toward a solution.
• I discovered strength I didn’t know I had.
• I learned it really does take a village; people showed up for me and for the dream. I kept at it even on days when I just wanted to stay in bed. And through all the ups and downs, I proved to myself: I could take a vision and make it real.

But here’s something else I discovered: Sometimes, we give up because the dream we’re chasing isn’t even truly ours. We’re living for someone else’s approval. Part of living our own dream is daring to be a bit “selfish”, to recognize that our breath, our gifts, our purpose, are meant for us to fully experience. When we get clear on our true voice, our life opens up. When we let conditions, circumstances, or other people’s expectations dictate what we can be, do, or have, life feels like a struggle, full of scarcity and unfulfilled hopes.

As women, we’re taught to aim for perfection. But what if we reframed failure as a critical part of the journey, a necessary ingredient that makes us wise and strong? Seriously, perfection is a myth. So why do we cling to it so tightly?

One word: Fear.

Let’s talk about fear as a signal, not a stop sign.

Failure and fear are prerequisites for every meaningful success. At the heart of failure is often fear, fear dressed up as practicality. Fear will tell us, “It’s not the right time,” “Wait until later,” or “You can’t afford that; it’s irresponsible.” But these are just our old beliefs protecting us in all the wrong ways.

All great successes come wrapped in plenty of failures. The trick is to recognize which old stories, what we call paradigms, are really running our lives.

There are three “D’s” that reveal when fear is calling the shots:

1. Delay (or Distraction): “I’m too tired tonight…my run can wait.”
2. Dissuasion: “I probably deserve a break. I’m not seeing results anyway. Is this even worth it?”
3. DEFCON 1: Full-on anxiety, overwhelm, panic, the kind that makes you want to crawl under a blanket and disappear. (Trust me, I know these all too well! That’s one reason I joined Brave Thinking Institute. I used to joke: I’d trip over a penny and it would take me two weeks to get back up. The big change? Now I know how to recognize those 3 D’s and reprogram my response. Would that be helpful for you?)

It’s not a question of if these old paradigms show up. They will. But the more you notice them, the more power you have to make a conscious choice for your dream.

Failure means you’re in the game. It means you’re reaching. What I love about DreamBuilder and Life Mastery Coaching is that you learn the art and language of results; you discover how to take inspired action aligned with what brings you alive.

Fear will come. Failure will happen. But if you learn to use both as fuel, reframing the old stories and patterns, you’ll find yourself moving toward a dream achieved.

And I’d love to help you with that. Are you ready to go three feet further and strike your gold?